BEGINNING
-Everything is colourful, lots of puffer fish are making patterns in the sand to attract females. Eventually we focus on a puffer fish who is struggling to make any kind of pattern.
- He looks at the other puffer fish and then at his own, he is frustrated and gives up and swims away.
- As he swims his surroundings become duller around him (reflection of how he feels).
- Dwelling on his failure to attract a mate, he becomes stressed and inflates.
- He (and maybe other puffer fish) notice that he has beautiful patterns on him when he inflates, normal puffer fish don't have this.
- He discovers that he can attract females with the patterns on his body instead of making patterns on the sea floor.
- The puffer fish is comfortable with the other fish and his surroundings, he is happy and content about being different. The surroundings change from dull to bright and colourful (a reflection of how he feels). END
This plot still seems quite rough around the edges. As a whole though, this seems to be how the story should flow.
He sounds beautiful!
ReplyDeleteJust a thought....what is your audience profile? the story seems attractive to children (think Elmer the Elephant), but attracting a mate is a bit more adult.